Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
What changed your mind?
Being sober
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Randomize
