if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
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