And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
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