I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
Your cat ate my taco.
. . . I don't have a cat?
It was laying in your bed. Now it's hunting for more tacos.
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