that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
It’s bad enough my brother slept with half of the sorority this year, but now he’s lifeguarding at the club and every divorcée and cougar in town is asking me for his number. My twin is a manwhore and I’ve become his pimp.
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