I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
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