oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
my vag is so smooth its legendary
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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