i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
Randomize
