dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
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