I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
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