Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
i would one night stand the shit outta him
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
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