he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
My roommate taped his phone to the ceiling fan to simulate walking so he could hatch Pokémon. Lazy people will always find a way.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
Randomize
