Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
areolas are like halos for boobs.
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
Randomize
