yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
Turns out that my surprise "happy birthday" drop-in for my dad turned into a "my parents like afternoon sex a lot" realization.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
Someone came in the potted fern
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
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