The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
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