I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
i used baking grease as lip gloss
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
Randomize
