i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
Randomize
