just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
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