I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
Randomize
