Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Randomize
