What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
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