Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
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