i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
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