I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
Randomize
