Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
Randomize
