She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
Are we still banned from the library?
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
Randomize
