You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize