i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
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