the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
this will be a night to untag.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
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