yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Randomize
