i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
Randomize
