i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
Randomize