Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
this will be a night to untag.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
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