Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
