All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
Randomize