Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
Randomize
