i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
it's like heaven, but drunker
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Randomize
