hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
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