So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
Dude! wtf happend last nite? I woke up with 2 black eyes and a head ache
You stepped off the curb and face planted the road...twice
Why didnt you hold me up....and why a second time?
I helped you up but figured it was wayy funnier to watch you fall again then lose my buzz....
fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
Randomize