I thought I drunk dialed Adam last night and left him a voicemail. I just checked my phone. I realize I left a drunk voicemail with my son's teacher.
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
Randomize
