I don't think brook has ever known best
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Randomize
