Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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