I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
I am one with the molecules
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
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