At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
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