so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
