Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
Randomize