before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Randomize