I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
