I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
Randomize