But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
Boobs speak an international language.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Randomize
