She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
Randomize